Should I Be Me?

Since I can remember, I have always been kind of shy, and reserved. I am outgoing with my friends and when I want to seem friendly, but I can't seem to get though wanting people to think good things of me. I don't want anyone to think I am dependent, needy, greedy, heartless bitch or that I take advantage of others. Being a beginning sugar baby, I have to get over this fear. I have a hard time asking for what I want and need. Well I don't know if I should call it a "fear" but you get what I'm saying. I hope. lol. I might just create an alter ego! This will give me an outlet for everything I hold back. lol. It's sounds pretty interesting to me. I don't want to be boring me.. I want to become the other I. :)

R-E-S-P-E-C-T ! !

Aretha Franklin sang it best! Had a pot SD I was scheduled to meet with last night, but it became too late so I decided to stay home. He had to work late. When he finally texted me to meet him I told him we would have to meet another time, because I had things to do the in the am. He tells me that whatever i have to do is not as important as what he has to do the next day. Whoa Whoa Whoa, backup..lol..Who the hell did he think he was to tell me what is important in my life.? Then he had the nerve to tell me "No, seriously come now. If this is going to work out you have to be available". When I was available at the time he stated he wasn't. I refuse to be told what to do. Money, or no money, SD or not. He didn't respect my time by being available when he said he would. I don't mind adjusting or even rescheduling, but don't act as if you have control over me just because you're a potential. It's just a respect issue I had. I told him to go find another because at the time I was not available whether he liked that or not. Was I wrong? Nahh..lol..
That left me thinking..these men seem to only want one thing. Am I some sort of sex object? I want to be treated with respect. Respect WINS Respect, Money doesn't.

What A Sour Day, No Sugar as Planned

Well, today has got to be worse day ever. I was supposed to meet Mr. Kickoff at his job today, but there was some sort of miscommunication about the time. I feel like he has been avoiding giving me money for my hair, nails, and shopping that he promised. I spoke my mind to him about it and told him I wanted an allowance to make the arrangement more controlled. He told me to name a price. I asked what did he think my time was worth. He said that he wasn't going to play games, so I told him $1600 for 4 days a month. He practically had a fit and said he wouldn't pay a prostitute or an escort $400 per visit. OBVIOUSLY HE NEEDS TO GO FIND ONE THAT IS CHEAPER THAN ME!! He is backwards! I asked him what he could offer so that he would feel comfortable with the amount, and he turns around and declines my price! He had officially pissed me off for the day. He soon changed his mind and told me that I needed to set a place and time to get the money but he didn't want to see me this month. I didn't understand his motives for that, but I didn't care much any more to ask why. I want him to want to give to me. It was as if I am pulling teeth to get the money from this man. He soon began to speak about why he wants a long term arrangement. Something about he has a 2.5 million dollar life insurance policy and no beneficiary. I'm not sure if its something I should believe, since he has bs'd me about the money he was suppose to have given me 5 days ago.

on the flip side

Today Mr. VP and I met at a local Starbucks at noon, on his lunch. He seems really shy just like me. The meeting was actually pretty awkward, and there were these awkward moments of us just staring at each other. LOL. I didn't mind much he has beautiful blue eyes. We didn't actually talk about an allowance until I got back home. He claims that he gave his previous baby $100 every Friday, 4x's a month. WTF was she thinking, but I guess that is a great example of the different needs and wants of SBs. I think this the girl Mr. Kickoff needs since he had an issue with my request for $400 per visit. LOL. Back to Mr. VP, his budget is $400 a month. Not going to get very far with that, but I negotiated with him so I only have to see him twice a month. I'm in need of cash quickly so I can pay off my tuition from last semester, so I can get back in school ASAP. He even had the nerve to ask if he could get an extra day or sugar for his birthday next month. Maybe we can work something out because his bday is 3 days before my Christmas cruise. I might need some extra cash ;)

More potentials have contacted me on AM and one on MA (MutualArrangements). I messaged a few of them today, but only one caught my eye. He is planning to visit Atlanta in two weeks and wants to take me to dinner. So im definitely looking forward to him. He shall not be named just yet.

Headed to bed now,
TTYL FELLOW SUGARS!!

Seeking the Sweet (Sugar) Life

Hola SB's,

I began my search for the perfect SD a little over a month ago. I'm so excited to begin this new journey, and decided to blog and share my experiences so far and the many more to come.

I have never been the one to ask for things from others. I always wanted to be so independent. That worked for a while, but now I'm in need of a major change. I actually had the chance to become a sugar baby during my first year of college, but I thought the guy was crazy because he offered to fly me to Miami. I was thinking he was some psycho who just wanted to get me alone to do bad things. I didn't know what to expect so I stopped communicating with him. When I think about it now, he might have been great. At the end of the day you WIN some and you LOSE some. I wish I would have known of the sugar lifestyle then. It would have saved me lots of frustration with loans and school related costs. My first and current SD whom I will call Mr. Kickoff. We met through SA.com and he is in the entertainment industry. He is a little over 20 years older than me. He's not exactly the best looking but we all have to start somewhere. Since I don't work and don't need help with any books (I took the semester off to figure out my career goals), I don't have an allowance with him. I see him when I want and ask for what I want when I want. I don't need much so he doesn't require attention. He has offered to pay off some tuition that I had left over from last semester. So that's a plus. I have to meet him tomorrow for some sugar ^_^ so you know im happy about that!

I have another potential who I meet tomorrow for coffee. We met through AM. We shall call him Mr. VP. He is a VP at a bank (hence the name..lol) and married, but is a real sweetheart. He is always calling me beautiful from the pictures we have exchanged, and telling me he can't wait to meet. I hope everything goes well with him tomorrow. Wish me luck!